Picture the scene, Wednesday, 9 September 2009, we are nearing the end of an Apple special event confirmed only days earlier after weeks of rumour. Apple are back playing to their strengths, music. Phil Schiller, Apple's senior vice president of Worldwide Product Marketing, has just about convinced us all why we need new shiny iPods.
With all the sales patter of a Walthamstow market trader, Big Phil has introduced the 64GB iPod touch, complete with 3 megapixels camera capable of video recording, a new styled iPod nano and smaller light iPod classic for the music purists.
iTunes 9 adds new 3D Augmented Reality style imagery using your Mac’s camera, social networking functions and beefier downloads, more of which later.
Those attending in need of musical inspiration are in luck. U2, now sponsored by RIM and BlackBerry, have gone the way of the dark side, and won't be playing, the iPod U2 Special Edition now wiped from Apple's collective memory. Rumours of U2 in waiting, Coldplay playing are nixed when the group are held up by customs for possessing a criminal record in 'Viva la Vida.'
Thankfully, Jack Johnson has sung himself to sleep on Venice beach and also fails to show for the event. Chris Isaak steps in with a haunting 'Wicked Game' musical interlude, Frank Booth nods somewhere in approval.
Phil Schiller wraps up with a new look higher capacity Apple TV nobody actually wants - still no AVI support - but new rumours emerge of an actual Apple branded TV on the horizon. Leading analysts later suggest sometime before 2020, or possibly not.
Hands sore with clapping, we are ready to grab coats and anoraks and leave when Phil suddenly stops in his tracks and says: "One more thing..." Before we can say 'copyright infringement' the room goes black, the big screen on stage suddenly flashes up four familiar faces frozen in time.
It’s The Beatles, the four lads who shook the world, John, Paul, George and Ringo and the unmistakable sound of 'Come Together,' newly remastered and sounding better than ever. Pundits in attendance start Googling the significance of the lyrics when first Sir Paul McCartney, Ringo Starr, Yoko and Sean Ono and Olivia and Dhani Harrison walk out on stage. Last and certainly not least, Steve Jobs reappears in his regular uniform of St. Croix mock turtleneck sweater, Levi's 501 jeans and New Balance 991 trainers.
Steve is here to tell us the entire back catalogue of The Beatles is now available on iTunes in a choice of ACC or Apple Lossless formats, complete with embedded PDF and QuickTime files.
The audience erupts in applause and chants of "Steve, Steve, Steve," grown men start to cry while Yoko looks out over the top of her dark glasses and wonders if this man is feeding off her karma. Macca gets the crowd going with an impromptu 'All You Need Is Love' while later Yoko says how John would have been an Apple fan had he lived. Ringo half jokingly says: "Buy our downloads, but don't send them to me for signing, no more signing. Love and peace."
Just as I was about to explode with excitement, being a life long Beatles fan, I woke up. It had all been a dream, or had it? And yes I do dream about work, it’s an occupational hazard. See you on Wednesday, 9 September 2009. All you need is love. Love and peace.
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