How do you solve a problem like Business Insider?

Journey with the Macalope, if you will, to the far-flung past! Well, June. Here's Jay Yarow responding to posts like this terrific piece by John Kirk.

"Apple Should Be Furious That It Has Such A Tiny Sliver Of The Smartphone Market"

As John Gruber noted at the time, Yarow didn't respond to Kirk's points. Instead he switched tactics. Even if Apple makes more money per point of market share--if that's true--shouldn't it just bother Apple that more people are using Android devices?

Ah, so it's a psychological thing now.

Oookay.

"You know what? We'll take the money. Thanks." - Apple

So, recently there have been a few data points that, go figure, show that market share "ain't all that," as none of the kids say these days. For example that--shocker!--iOS destroyed Android in Black Friday shopping traffic. Here's Yarow on that:

These are both measured in the U.S., which is a unique market for iOS. However, this is still a jaw-dropping gap in usage between the two platforms. It suggests that the focus on smartphone market share misses a bigger picture about how the platforms are actually used.

Ohmuhgawd, if only someone had been telling Yarow and his human personification of a clown-shoe boss that for, oh, two years. And this is how Yarow has to find out?! He has to read it from comScore?! Just terrible. Maybe if we had wadded up all the previous evidence, stuffed it in a flounder and whacked Yarow upside the face with the flounder, maybe then he would have gotten the message sooner. Hard to say.

As cynical as the Macalope is, even he hoped that the fact that market share in and of itself might not mean everything was slowly dawning on Yarow might indicate a shift in Business Insider's coverage. Isn't that adorable?! The Macalope! Bred specifically for the purpose of poking silly pundits! Well, rest assured, there's no indication of that at all. Here's how Business Insider reported the most recent results from Kantar Worldpanel, results that show that half of iPhone 5c buyers are switching from Android and that the iPhone's market share in October was 76 percent in Japan and 52 percent in the U.S.

"Apple's iPhone Market Share Has Been All But Wiped Out In Spain" (no link, as if, but tip o' the antlers to Brad Skidmore).

That's it. They dove deep into the report and that's what they came up with. It's all about Spain. Which, weird coincidence, just happens to be the place the iPhone is doing the worst.

And, yet, BI still finds it very rude that the Macalope does not link to their baits, even after they go to all the trouble of using that douchey thing that dumps the link in every time you copy/paste some text from the article! Oh, well.

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